Beth looked into the mirror, searching. She wasn’t entirely sure what it was she was looking for. Confirmation, reassurance, confidence… Beth was looking for someone to reassure her that she was either right or wrong, because she couldn’t tell the difference between the two at that point. More than anything, looking at her own eyes in the mirror, she was challenging herself. Daring herself. With credit to her need to rise to any competition, Beth closed her eyes, allowing herself to try to relax, to try to stop rethinking everything. She pulled her hair out of the bun it was in, running her fingers through the waves curling around her face in an attempt to make herself look presentable. Beth hadn’t put much effort into anything concerning her looks that day - finals were meant to be the only thing on her mind. (Though that didn’t quite go through.) Beth gave up after a moment, and stuffed the $30 she’d been given by her father into her back pocket before shrugging her jacket on. A moment later, Beth was out the door, checking her phone quickly as she walked down her street. Beth stuffed her fingers into her pocket, but pulled them out a moment later, biting down on her nails as she walked. She couldn’t stop fidgeting, her fingers and nerves restless. Beth hopped up onto the curb, and walked with one foot in front of the other, walking as quickly as she could.
This went all too slowly for Beth’s liking, so she hopped off of the curb and jogged, letting her hair and the wind whip against her face. Beth regretted this in a few minutes, as she was at Jasper’s house much more quickly than she would’ve liked. Beth slowed down as she walked up Jasper’s driveway, her hands wringing together. She reached a hand up to tuck her hair behind her ear as she approached the front stoop, and attempted to calm down what felt like heart burn before she knocked on the door three times. It’s okay, Beth thought to herself, attempting to reassure herself. Rip the band aid off. This calm was gone not a few seconds later, and Beth had to do her best to run from the house. To the Lake, to her house - anywhere but Jasper’s. Anywhere but Jasper. Beth didn’t want to face him, didn’t want to see him. She didn’t want to even have to acknowledge his existence, because it didn’t sit well somewhere in the pit of her stomach. It unhinged her, took away the comfort of knowing that Beth lived with. Beth shook her head at herself. Fucking Turtle, she thought.